Friday, April 20, 2012

Heart Thoughts-High Risk Appointment--Faithful Forever


Finally it was the day for the high risk appointment.  We went and had an ultrasound, then met with the doctor, and our world first began to really shake.  He explained that there were several things of concern.  He first drew a picture on a white board, and explained that there were two spaces in the brain called lateral ventricles.  The baby had extra fluid in these spaces.  But that's about all he knew.  He could say why, just that it was there.  It wasn't a large amount, but enough to be of concern, especially given my high level of amniotic fluid.  There were a few more things of concern too: the baby's eyes were close together, it was measuring small, the chin appeared recessed, and the abdomen was small.  Nothing terribly alarming by itself, but not quite normal either.  He suggested we have twice weekly ultrasounds and non-stress tests to check on the baby and keep an eye on things, and suggested an amniocentesis to see if we could find anything there.  

So, there were really no answers, just many many questions.  They felt that something was wrong with the baby, but they just didn't know what.  We had a few tears in the office, but were mostly able to keep it together.  However, as I got in the car and left that appointment (we had driven separately and met there), a song came on the radio that I'd never heard before.  It caught my attention from the beautiful piano music at the beginning, and at the very first few words, I knew God was ministering to my breaking heart.  "Be still, there is a healer..."  

That song went on to be played quite often on the radio, and we still hear it occasionally.  I marvel at how God was letting me know, even then at the very beginning of this journey, that He was there, that He is, and will remain, faithful forever. 




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