Heart Thoughts-Heaven

Since Waverly has been born, I have noticed a strange phenomenon in my own life and perspective. I see so much more pain than I ever have noticed before, but I also see so much more beauty as well. Every little thing, like a smile, her being awake, time together as a family, hold so much more meaning than ever before, because I am more keenly aware than ever that it could all change in a moment. There are times that my heart just sings from the seemingly small things.

However, this morning I woke up with a profound sadness in my heart. Not a self-pity, not a weariness, just a sadness in missing "something." I feel incomplete. Not quite right. And I realized I am missing HEAVEN.

There are times that I realize as I go day to day that this.is.not. how it's supposed to be. There is MORE. So much more.... The beauty that is here all around is tainted. Even the most beautiful things. And it's hitting me hard today, a longing for heaven.

For those who read this blog, if you only remember one thing ever, remember this-THERE IS MORE. All of this is not in vain. This is not the best that it gets. The whole purpose of all of this life is for a higher purpose. I'm not talking about some theoretical "higher purpose" that sounds all lofty and mysterious and "nice." It's GOD'S purpose. For HIS glory.

We were made to glorify Him. Either we do or we don't. Just as in life, there are consequences for whatever path we are on, to glorify Him or not.

Oh I fall short. We all do. None of us is perfect. But the amazing thing is that that is the point. We can't do it fully on our own. We NEED Him. It's called grace. Redemption. Mercy. JESUS.

If in all of this we are not clinging to Him and pointing others to Him, then we have failed. It's not about how we are such good people, or how cute Waverly is, or how special we are to have her, or how many lives she's "touched." Even though those are all good and nice, there is more. And my soul is feeling that this morning. I am not home. This is not home. This is not how it's supposed to be.

And I can't wait for it to all be made right again. Not in an "I can't take this anymore" way. But because this morning, while I still see and delight in all the beauty around, I see a lot of ugly too. Ugly world. Ugly sin. Blemished, tainted, broken. But one day, it will all be made right again, and I can't wait to worship Him in glory. Worship Him with me now, today. And let's worship together forever in heaven too.

Come, Lord Jesus, come.